Day Two of Self-Discovery Journaling Prompts:
What's my most recurrent feeling?
My most recurrent feeling as of lately has been nostalgia. I am very content with how my life is currently, but I often feel a sense of nostalgia in the midst of it all. I miss how things used to feel when I was younger. I miss my early to mid 20's. The way I was just living at home with my family and how it was the same thing over and over again. I miss how simple it all was.
The way that my friends and I were somehow at the same place in life, even though we were all living different experiences. I miss how we were almost carefree. I can only remember all the good parts of it. I think I'm having a hard time swallowing this new pill called, "Growing Up." It's different than it was before.
Growing up is hard, but it just keeps happening. It doesn't stop and we're all constantly evolving. I started playing, "As It Was" by Harry Styles while typing this because that is what it feels like.
I miss my first car. The way that car (named Luna) was there for me at the beginning of my adulthood is something I think about pretty often. It was something that was with me on my journey to discovering myself at that time. All the people that have come and gone in that lifetime, that car has been there. Now, I have a newer car that I love and I'm so grateful for, but Luna is quite literally in my heart forever.
I know that we are not supposed to feel the same as we did a few years back, but I can't help but miss it all. With life constantly moving on, I try to keep myself present and make new experiences. I fear that I hold onto the past more than I should and I'm possibly romanticizing the difficult times I went through. This is not to say that I am ungrateful for my current life, I love my life now and it really is something that I have manifested and wanted for so long. I am just taking the time to process it all and I think it's good to do that every so often. I think I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around all the changes that have happened in recent times.
My friends are grown ups too. My family is getting older. I live with my partner and this is the most independent I have ever been in my life. It's so scary and exciting. I can't help but feel nostalgic for the life I once lived.
Comments